MARGARET MATRAY Casper Star-Tribune | Posted: Tuesday, August 3, 2010 9:55 pm | No Comments
LANDER — On tables stood red paper silhouettes — miniature representations of people who once lived.
They exemplified the 57 women, seven men, four boys and one girl who have been killed as a result of domestic violence in Wyoming since 1985. And for three women who spoke Tuesday at the Wind River Native American Conference, they represented a sister, nephews, daughters.
For Jolene Lux, it was her sister, Beckie, and Beckie’s three sons, murdered in Thermopolis in 1990. For Theresa Pacheco, it was her daughter Melissa, who was bludgeoned to death by her husband at the age of 23 in 2003. The most recent addition to the silhouettes is Kelly Burgess, daughter of state Rep. Kathy Davison, R-Kemmerer. She was pregnant when her husband killed her in October.
“I can tell you that we never thought it would touch our lives,” Davison said of domestic violence. “But it did.”
Along with attorney Gay Woodhouse of the Wyoming Silent Witness Initiative, the three women opened the eighth annual conference, “Healing Generations ... Walking Together.” Nearly 300 people are registered for the three-day conference, sponsored by the Wyoming U.S. Attorney’s Office, Bureau of Indian Affairs, Eastern Shoshone and Northern Arapaho business councils and the Office for Victims of Crime.
This year’s meeting focuses on victims of crime in Indian Country, with an emphasis on women and children.
In 2008, Davison told the crowd, the Wyoming Attorney General’s Office, Division of Victim Services, reported that it served 4,583 domestic violence victims. In one day, it helped 234.
What’s more, a survey conducted by the University of Wyoming revealed that 23 percent of its participants had been victims of domestic violence in their lifetimes, 7.9 percent in the last year.
“We know there are many more out there unreported every day,” Davison said. “No one deserves to be abused.”
The Wyoming Silent Witness Initiative began 13 years ago, joining a national initiative designed to raise awareness, advocate and encourage legislative action to end violence. It also remembers and honors victims of domestic violence through the silhouettes, whether they are small paper cutouts that fit on the table or life-size wooden figures that tour the state.
The initiative had a mission to end domestic violence murders by 2010.
“It’s 2010, and we have not reached that goal,” Woodhouse said. “But I think we can. Things like (this conference) can help each one of us take the steps to make sure these things don’t occur.”
By sharing their stories, Davison, Lux and Pacheco hope to stop the cycle of violence, teach others the warning signs and educate the public on how to treat friends and family of domestic violence victims.
Lux and Pacheco spoke of their experiences with the justice system, reminding families of victims that the system is slow and does not always end the pain.
Twenty years after her sister died, Lux must still attend parole board, asking them not to reduce the killer’s life sentence. Pacheco remembers leaving the court proceedings at times. It was too hard to listen.
“I wanted to remember my Melissa the way she was, not the way someone killed her,” Pacheco said.
Looking back, Davison now recognizes some of the warning signs in her daughter. She remembers Kelly telling her that her husband didn’t want her wearing makeup and perfume anymore. Davison once stopped an argument between the two. Kelly’s husband was putting her down. Davison asked her why she put up with it, and Kelly said, “I know, Mom. But it’s not that bad.”
“My daughter, like many women, did not realize how quickly the situation can change,” Davison said.
Domestic violence is not inevitable, Woodhouse said. The community contributes to it in many ways, she said, by failing to recognize abuse and speak out, by believing the victim is at fault, by turning a blind eye. And it is the community that can also make change.
“You are the ones, you are advocates,” Woodhouse said. “… Each one of us is capable of doing something.”
Contact Margaret Matray at margaret.matray@trib.com or 307-266-0535.
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