Thursday, October 6, 2011

Article: Seeking an end to domestic violence

San Diego County residents have endured extreme and heart-wrenching loss in recent months as intimate partner violence has escalated to murder-suicide, in some cases ending the lives of entire families.

Spouses killing spouses. Boyfriends killing girlfriends. Parents killing children. And the perpetrators of these crimes dying by suicide.

Murder-suicides have taken place throughout the county this year and forever changed the lives of countless friends, families, neighbors and colleagues.

People of all ages, backgrounds and walks of life were impacted by the violence. And every single death was preventable. Everyone can take action and help prevent these incidents by educating themselves about domestic violence and where to call for assistance, supporting those experiencing violence, and participating in events to raise awareness about domestic violence.

On Oct. 8, residents will come together in Balboa Park – asking for one day free of violence as they honor the lives of 14 people killed by domestic violence in 2010 during the annual HOPE in the Park event.

Ongoing mental health issues and substance abuse or dependency issues often coincide with domestic violence. For example, depression can lead to feelings of desperation and hopelessness. There is also a link to substance abuse, as a study by SANDAG found that approximately 30 percent of those arrested on suspicion of domestic violence tested positive for methamphetamine.

A common thread through some of the recent murder-suicides is desperation. People who feel backed into a corner and helpless often make irrational decisions. Too frequently, we see people reach a point of hopelessness that drives them to kill their loved ones – and sometimes themselves.

Domestic violence can escalate to homicide, but usually starts out less extreme.

In 2010, there were 12 people killed in San Diego County by an intimate partner. There were also two others killed related to domestic violence, one a new boyfriend and the other a mother-in-law. That year 16,880 domestic violence incidents were reported to police in San Diego County.

This year, the violence has continued to increase, with as many as 15 individuals killed in the county where the suspect was an intimate partner (current or former) and related others (friends, family, new partners, etc.) were also slain.

Many cases end with the perpetrator dying by suicide. The case of Kevin Collier exemplifies these tragic dynamics. Collier killed his 4-month-old daughter and his mother-in-law before taking his own life. He also nearly killed police officer Jarred Slocum during a related shootout.

Warning signs for someone who may commit homicide/suicide include prior family violence, threats of violence and suicide, prior history of mental illness or substance abuse, and isolation from family and friends.

It is rarely easy to leave an abusive relationship and it is sometimes dangerous. But there are professionals available to assist you if you or someone you know is thinking about leaving an abusive relationship.

Nearly 1,400 adults and children reside in emergency domestic violence shelters each day in California, with a similar number in transitional shelters that are steppingstones to new violence-free lives.

Treatment is also available for people struggling with issues like depression and substance abuse.

If you are experiencing an emergency that may threaten the safety of yourself or someone else, please call 911. If you need information about how to handle a mental health crisis, contact the Access and Crisis Line at 1 (800) 479-3339, where help is available 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

There are also services and treatment in the county for victims of domestic violence, their children and batterers, including confidential shelters, restraining orders and counseling services.

Those needing help can call the San Diego domestic violence hotline for information and assistance in planning how to leave safely. You can call 888-DV-LINKS, which is staffed by trained professionals 24 hours a day, seven days a week. You can also call 211.

You may also visit the San Diego Violence Council’s website – www.sddvc.org – for resources and information about the Oct. 8 HOPE in the Park event.

If we all work together as a community, we can put an end to domestic violence. We can start on Oct. 8 with supporting an entire day free from violence at HOPE in the Park. There will be musical performances, activities and resource tables from 1-6 p.m. and a candlelight vigil will held from 6-7 p.m. in remembrance of those who have been killed by domestic violence.

Everyone deserves to live a long, healthy, happy life. Ending violence is a step in the right direction. Join us on Oct. 8.

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