Article: Ending the cycle of domestic abuse

By Stephanie Stough - Art & Life Editor -

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Published: Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Updated: Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Carlos Restrepo
Women bring diversity to the world and, more importantly, life. They feel, they love, they nurture, and they provide for the people they love most.
Unfortunately, every day they are raped, abused and killed, mostly by their intimate partners.
According to the U.S. Department of Peace, 1.5 million women are raped each year. There are 5.3 million reports of abuse on women from an intimate partner each year, and from 1976 to 1996 a reported 31,260 women were murdered by a partner.
Studies by the Office of the Surgeon General report that domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women between the ages of 15 and 44, and that they these injuries more common than automobile accidents, muggings and cancer deaths combined, according to the American Medical Association.
According to the FBI, among all female murder victims in the United States in 2003, 30 percent were slain by their husbands or boyfriends.
It goes without saying that domestic violence statistics are shocking.
Not only are they appalling, but they are rarely discussed. When did the land of the free become a place for such violence?
Women are a vital part of the human race. They are no lesser than their male counterparts. Women are just as capable of achieving their goals as men. Abuse against women needs to come to an end because simply, women don’t deserve it. No woman deserves to be a victim of violence, especially by someone they trust in an intimate relationship.
Regardless of a woman’s words or actions, nothing justifies rape, abuse or murder by their husbands or boyfriends.
There are plenty of things that people can do to prevent violent acts against women. The first is to know the signs of abuse from both the victim and the perpetrator. Someone who may be in an abusive relationship may feel helpless or be afraid of her partner.
They may think that they deserve to be hurt or mistreated. The abusive partner may be overly protective, may be critical, or even blame their partner for the abusive behavior.
Knowing the signs of an abusive relationship early on can prevent domestic violence before it takes place. If abuse takes place, tell someone trustworthy or call (800) 799-SAFE (7233), the National Domestic Abuse and Violence Hotline.
Another way to help prevent abuse is to boycott media that may encourage abuse against women. Both men and women can become desensitized to abuse after seeing it in movies, music videos and TV shows and music, such as the popular song by Sublime titled “Date Rape” Be able to recognize scenes and references to violence against women and be knowledgeable, but never forget that all violence is wrong.
Another tactic to help prevent domestic abuse is to talk it over. When couples are very open about the limits of the relationship, the chances of abuse will likely decrease.
Couples with a mutual respect for each other will have a much more successful relationship. Open up. Tell each other what is okay and what is not, especially when it comes to dealing with conflict.
It may be beneficial for couples to call a “time-out” when they think an argument is getting too heated.
The most effective way to prevent domestic abuse is to have self-respect. When women have respect for themselves, they are strong.
When a woman demands respect from her partner, she cannot fail. If abuse comes in the way of a woman who has respect for herself and her body, it will be much easier for her to get out of a violent situation, for she has set limitations for herself.
For more information about domestic abuse and counseling, visit the Counseling Department at STLCC-Meramec in Clark Hall. Otherwise, go hug a woman.